If Johnny Were A Millionaire...

In a classroom: "Take a pencil and paper," the teacher said, "and write an essay with the title 'If I Were a Millionaire.'" 

Everyone but Johnny, who leaned back with arms folded, began to write furiously. 

"What's the matter," the teacher asked. "Why don't you begin?" 

"I'm waiting for my secretary," he replied. 

- from arcamax